Tuesday, July 22, 2014

What are you waiting for?

John Lennon once said "Life is what happens while you are making other plans" And its true. We seem to get so caught up in our own little plans and schemes that we forget that life is happening all around us, right now.

Now don't get me wrong, anticipation is a beautiful thing. It can give us a heightened sense of excitement. Think back to what it was like being a kid waiting for Christmas morning. The anticipation that built up once December hit was incredible.

The waiting that I am talking about is the kind where you think your life will be all sorted by the time you reach ( fill in the magical number) age. Or the "I'll be happy when...."; the kids start school, finish school, leave home, when I weigh ( fill in the other magical number), when  the house is renovated, we get a new car and on and on the list goes.

And our life slips by while we wait for everything to be just right.

I blame Goldilocks

Goldilocks had it all right in front of her: the ready made porridge, the cozy beds but she still managed to find fault with everything  before settling on the perfect bowl of porridge and the perfect bed. And we are the same. Life is laid before us, in all it's glory and we choose to wait for the right time, for things to be perfect, or for some other ephemeral thing.

I've been gulity of it myself. When I was younger I thought that things would look and be a certain way by the time I was thirty ( they weren't). I thought life would change radically when we moved house ( it didn't) but most damaging of all has been what I have denied myself in the process.

Stop Waiting

For years I didn't go swimming because I thought I was too fat and hideous to wear a bathing suit and then one day I changed my mind. I bought a bathing suit and went swimming. The Earth did not stop. In fact people barely even noticed. The day that I first ventured into a public swimming pool no-one even batted an eye. You see the thing is everybody is only wondering what people are thinking of them so they don't have time to worry about you too.

“You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.”

I know I'm not the only one. We all seem to have this crazy idea that we have to be perfect and yet a lot of the things that we love about life were accidents or mistakes. Failure happens and you survive and often, your life is richer for the mistakes that you made. Your grow and stretch and realize that mistake wasn't a tragedy after all.

The movie "The Bucket List" got a lot of people taking action.

If you haven't seen it go rent it our and watch it. Two old guys decide to do things that they have always wanted to do because they are both dying. The sad thing is we all are dying we just don't know when. I guess this was brought home to me earlier this year with the two deaths in my family. My brother was diagnosed with cancer in 2012 and so he took up floristry, something he had always been interested in. Sadly he passed away in February this year but at least he got to try something he had always wanted to.

I always wanted to do yoga but my list of excuses was long: too fat, not bendy, it would be too hard for me and on and on it went. But the longing for it was always there so this year I finally did it. I've only been to three classes so far but I love it. Now I ask myself "why didn't I do this sooner?" And the asnwer is simple we think we have to wait for things to be perfect..... and they never will be

There is a Grumpy Cat meme that I love that says: There are two things I hate... change..... and the way things are. Which sums it up nicely, none of us likes change but a lot of us aren't happy with the way our life is either so we need to take action - even if it is one small step in the direction you want to go. Start. Now.

Top Five Tips for Changing Your Life

(1) Brainstorm ideas of everything you have ever wanted to do.
 Get it all down on paper and then take a look at it and cross off anything that isn't what you really want to do. Sometimes the things that we thought we wanted were just what we thought we should want and not what we actually want.

(2) Create a vision board
Now that you know what you want create an image of what that would look like and feel like. Grab a sketch pad and a stack of magazines and start pasting pictures of what you want to do onto it 

(3) Act "as if" 
This is the old fake it til you make it trick. My husband and I play a game where we talk about things as if they have already happened and we are enjoying them now. It helps shift your focus from what is happening at present so that you are a great er vibratory match for what it is you are trying to create.

As Einstein says  "You cannot solve a problem from the same consciousness that created it. You must learn to see the world anew.

(4) Repeat affirmations

If you have created a vision board hopefully you have written some affirmations on there as well. Affirmations are always written in the present tense and some times this feels like we are lying to ourselves.  Or our inner voice is going "I don't think so" One way around this is to state it  this way "I am in the process of.... losing weight, becoming a millionaire, winning lotto"or whatever else you are wanting to create . This shifts the focus to the reality - you are a work in progress.

(5) Gratitude

Ahh my old favorite. Give thanks for what you already have. Want a new, slimmer body? Love the one you already have because you cannot change anything from a position of hate. Want a flash car? Be grateful that the one you have already works fine and gets you where you need to go. I'm sure you get the idea.
 

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